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Hola Amigos!

Buffalewd

Buffalewd

Well-Known Member
Hola!, amigos.

It's been a long time since I rapped at ya, but I been workin' for a living, taking what they're giving, all that. Actually, to be honest, I ain't been working all that hard lately, mostly smoking. I left my bull**** car parking job at CU games for verde pastures: sitting around on my ass and enjoying the finer things.

I wasn't even thinking about getting a job for, like, a month or so, figuring I'd just coast on my nest egg for selling my tickets to dumb ass NE fans, at $250 a ticket, I was living large!

But let’s talk about the USC game. Mi and the mi padres were super excited for this game, I picked up beers and we were in full force in the parking lot. I had a dream the night before that we had this one in the bag, satchel, sack. Well, it looked great for 3 quarters and we were partying hard, then CU had to pull a CU! Damn amigos!, why do we hate winning?

I ain’t blaming the players or coaches, but yeah, they both sucked this one up! Seems to me that this program is like a Miley Cyrus concert, kind of cute, try hard, and at the end of the day just plain sucks, and you want your money back!

Well, I don’t want Jimmy to be a downer, so I bet $50 on the buffs to cover tomorrow. God, I better be right, or I will be living in without electricity for a month.

So tomorrow, I will be drinking a lot of beer and eating pizzas, Go Buffs!. Adios!
 
SINKRATZ said:
On some level I admire your commitment to this character you’re trying to create, even if it’s fallen pretty flat so far. Keep it up, maybe you’ll get funny eventually.
Click to expand...
It's an ode not a creation. Jim Anchower was my favorite contributor to The Onion back in the day.
 
SINKRATZ said:
On some level I admire your commitment to this character you’re trying to create, even if it’s fallen pretty flat so far. Keep it up, maybe you’ll get funny eventually.
Click to expand...
Don’t think he’s creating it. There used to be a fictional contributor to the onion with the same photo and much the same style/tone but I can’t remember his name.

edit:buffedup beat me to it
Edit to edit: and daah...I need more coffee
 
Wait, was this from the Onion? That makes it worse - don’t try it do a character from the Onion and do it terribly.
 
i took the points and the Buffs last weekend, thereby "winning" $50. i'd rather have the actual win and light the 50 on fire in celebration. amateurs.

i am on my 4th mimosa (served in pint glasses, as the drinking gods intended). i may just power straight through to the game. that way, if it gets bad, i can just hit the human off switch and pass out.

welcome, shamelessly derivative poster. grading on a curve, you get a gentlemen's "C" for effort.
 
Liver said:
i took the points and the Buffs last weekend, thereby "winning" $50. i'd rather have the actual win and light the 50 on fire in celebration. amateurs.

i am on my 4th mimosa (served in pint glasses, as the drinking gods intended). i may just power straight through to the game. that way, if it gets bad, i can just hit the human off switch and pass out.

welcome, shamelessly derivative poster. grading on a curve, you get a gentlemen's "C" for effort.
Click to expand...

Harsh assessment. You need a nap.
 
BuffsNYC said:
Harsh assessment. You need a nap.
Click to expand...

probably. operating a chain saw makes me grumpy. good thing i paused the mimosas, however. this whole "defensible space" thing is a pain in the ass.

i read about these services that will come out and spray foam your entire house if a fire is coming. i wonder how reliable they are. you know the other thing that would be super awesome? a Buff game on national tv in the day time. for us marathon drinkers.
 
Liver said:
probably. operating a chain saw makes me grumpy. good thing i paused the mimosas, however. this whole "defensible space" thing is a pain in the ass.

i read about these services that will come out and spray foam your entire house if a fire is coming. i wonder how reliable they are. you know the other thing that would be super awesome? a Buff game on national tv in the day time. for us marathon drinkers.
Click to expand...
I though that in the East Bay, the term, “Defensible space” Was reserved for things like this:
1572727493110.jpeg
 
Liver said:
probably. operating a chain saw makes me grumpy. good thing i paused the mimosas, however. this whole "defensible space" thing is a pain in the ass.

i read about these services that will come out and spray foam your entire house if a fire is coming. i wonder how reliable they are. you know the other thing that would be super awesome? a Buff game on national tv in the day time. for us marathon drinkers.
Click to expand...
Couldn't you just find several drunks from the BART and have them come out and pee on everything until it is too wet to burn.
 
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