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Oct 5th - Arizona @ Colorado

We need to beat Arizona.

The fact that we've lost 6 out of the last 7 to these posers is unacceptable, and it needs to stop now.

Arizona should never be anywhere close to decent in football. They're a basketball school, and one that needs to cheat to even be that.

Arizona is in a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school. Also, said natural beauty is only bearable half the year, otherwise you feel like you're walking on the surface of the sun. I believe people get sunstroke walking across the street. Which, if you think about it, could explain how the following decisions were made.

Arizona's mascot is the Wildcat. Wow - super creative, Arizona. Did you figure 'Tigers' wasn't mainstream enough for you? Oh, and Miss Wildcat, Minnie Mouse called and said she wanted the blatant ripoff of "Well, I guess we need something for the girls" back.

I don't know what the deal is with 'Bear Down'. Is it their school motto or something? Is it like that "Tear 'em asunder" thing they do in Fort Collins? Anyway, if they think it is cool, just like their apparent notion that their men's basketball program isn't dirty as ****, they're wrong. As has been pointed out in other threads, the only time you should hear the words "Bear Down" together is when someone is trying to pop a human out of another human. Otherwise, it sounds like you're taking a ****, in which case "Bear Down" is the last thing you should do. That's how Elvis died, you know.

They call themselves "Zona". We call them the Chards. Because Chards is creative. Zona sounds like your alcoholic uncle trying to tell you where he wants to retire.

Arizona doesn't have the reputation of its rival school Arizona State for all of their female students being strippers, so that's good. Or is it? Could it be that the stripper recruiters took the 90 minute trip down from Tempe to Tucson, took a look around, said "Nuh uh", and headed back to Tempe? I mean, what's the more logical scenario? Exactly.

Speaking of retirement, the state of Arizona ranks second only to Florida in terms of places people go to die. Colorado attracts young, dynamic people wanting to live among active, energetic people like themselves (who might be potheads). Arizona attracts irritable old people from the Midwest who only live for golf and I guess pickleball, whatever the **** that is.

Truth be told, Colorado is better than Arizona in every single way. Like literally all of them. So it stands to reason that this losing streak must end. Now.
 
Last edited:
Alfred91 said:
We need to beat Arizona.

The fact that we've lost 6 out of the last 7 to these posers is unacceptable, and it needs to stop now.

Arizona should never be anywhere close to decent in football. They're a basketball school, and one that needs to cheat to even be that.

Arizona is a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school. Also, said natural beauty is only bearable half the year, otherwise you feel like you're walking on the surface of the sun. I believe people get sunstroke walking across the street. Which, if you think about it, could explain how the following decisions were made.

Arizona's mascot is the Wildcat. Wow - super creative, Arizona. Did you figure 'Tigers' wasn't mainstream enough for you? Oh, and Miss Wildcat, Minnie Mouse called and said she wanted the blatant ripoff of "Well, I guess we need something for the girls" back.

I don't know what the deal is with 'Bear Down'. Is it their school motto or something? Is it like that "Tear 'em asunder" thing they do in Fort Collins? Anyway, if they think it is cool, just like their apparent notion that their men's basketball program isn't dirty as ****, they're wrong. As has been pointed out in other threads, the only time you should hear the words "Bear Down" together is when someone is trying to pop a human out of another human. Otherwise, it sounds like you're taking a ****, in which case "Bear Down" is the last thing you should do. That's how Elvis died, you know.

They call themselves "Zona". We call them the Chards. Because Chards is creative. Zona sounds like your alcoholic uncle trying to tell you where he wants to retire.

Arizona doesn't have the reputation of its rival school Arizona State for all of their female students being strippers, so that's good. Or is it? Could it be that the stripper recruiters took the 90 minute trip down from Tempe to Tucson, took a look around, said "Nuh uh", and headed back to Tempe. I mean, what's the more logical scenario? Exactly.

Speaking of retirement, the state of Arizona ranks second only to Florida in terms of places people go to die. Colorado attracts young, dynamic people wanting to live among active, energetic people like themselves (who might be potheads). Arizona attracts irritable old people from the Midwest who only live for golf and I guess pickleball, whatever the **** that is.

Truth be told, Colorado is better than Arizona in every single way. Like literally all of them. So it stands to reason that this losing streak must end. Now.
Click to expand...
Is this an audition to write this week’s ****ty preview?

Pretty ****ty.
 
Alfred91 said:
We need to beat Arizona.

The fact that we've lost 6 out of the last 7 to these posers is unacceptable, and it needs to stop now.

Arizona should never be anywhere close to decent in football. They're a basketball school, and one that needs to cheat to even be that.

Arizona is a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school. Also, said natural beauty is only bearable half the year, otherwise you feel like you're walking on the surface of the sun. I believe people get sunstroke walking across the street. Which, if you think about it, could explain how the following decisions were made.

Arizona's mascot is the Wildcat. Wow - super creative, Arizona. Did you figure 'Tigers' wasn't mainstream enough for you? Oh, and Miss Wildcat, Minnie Mouse called and said she wanted the blatant ripoff of "Well, I guess we need something for the girls" back.

I don't know what the deal is with 'Bear Down'. Is it their school motto or something? Is it like that "Tear 'em asunder" thing they do in Fort Collins? Anyway, if they think it is cool, just like their apparent notion that their men's basketball program isn't dirty as ****, they're wrong. As has been pointed out in other threads, the only time you should hear the words "Bear Down" together is when someone is trying to pop a human out of another human. Otherwise, it sounds like you're taking a ****, in which case "Bear Down" is the last thing you should do. That's how Elvis died, you know.

They call themselves "Zona". We call them the Chards. Because Chards is creative. Zona sounds like your alcoholic uncle trying to tell you where he wants to retire.

Arizona doesn't have the reputation of its rival school Arizona State for all of their female students being strippers, so that's good. Or is it? Could it be that the stripper recruiters took the 90 minute trip down from Tempe to Tucson, took a look around, said "Nuh uh", and headed back to Tempe? I mean, what's the more logical scenario? Exactly.

Speaking of retirement, the state of Arizona ranks second only to Florida in terms of places people go to die. Colorado attracts young, dynamic people wanting to live among active, energetic people like themselves (who might be potheads). Arizona attracts irritable old people from the Midwest who only live for golf and I guess pickleball, whatever the **** that is.

Truth be told, Colorado is better than Arizona in every single way. Like literally all of them. So it stands to reason that this losing streak must end. Now.
Click to expand...
Excellent! One small fact check - Arizona is not a city.
 
Alfred91 said:
We need to beat Arizona.

The fact that we've lost 6 out of the last 7 to these posers is unacceptable, and it needs to stop now.

Arizona should never be anywhere close to decent in football. They're a basketball school, and one that needs to cheat to even be that.

Arizona is a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school. Also, said natural beauty is only bearable half the year, otherwise you feel like you're walking on the surface of the sun. I believe people get sunstroke walking across the street. Which, if you think about it, could explain how the following decisions were made.

Arizona's mascot is the Wildcat. Wow - super creative, Arizona. Did you figure 'Tigers' wasn't mainstream enough for you? Oh, and Miss Wildcat, Minnie Mouse called and said she wanted the blatant ripoff of "Well, I guess we need something for the girls" back.

I don't know what the deal is with 'Bear Down'. Is it their school motto or something? Is it like that "Tear 'em asunder" thing they do in Fort Collins? Anyway, if they think it is cool, just like their apparent notion that their men's basketball program isn't dirty as ****, they're wrong. As has been pointed out in other threads, the only time you should hear the words "Bear Down" together is when someone is trying to pop a human out of another human. Otherwise, it sounds like you're taking a ****, in which case "Bear Down" is the last thing you should do. That's how Elvis died, you know.

They call themselves "Zona". We call them the Chards. Because Chards is creative. Zona sounds like your alcoholic uncle trying to tell you where he wants to retire.

Arizona doesn't have the reputation of its rival school Arizona State for all of their female students being strippers, so that's good. Or is it? Could it be that the stripper recruiters took the 90 minute trip down from Tempe to Tucson, took a look around, said "Nuh uh", and headed back to Tempe? I mean, what's the more logical scenario? Exactly.

Speaking of retirement, the state of Arizona ranks second only to Florida in terms of places people go to die. Colorado attracts young, dynamic people wanting to live among active, energetic people like themselves (who might be potheads). Arizona attracts irritable old people from the Midwest who only live for golf and I guess pickleball, whatever the **** that is.

Truth be told, Colorado is better than Arizona in every single way. Like literally all of them. So it stands to reason that this losing streak must end. Now.
Click to expand...
like swiss chards?
 
Alfred91 said:
Arizona is a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school.
Click to expand...


Oh my.
 
Alfred91 said:
We need to beat Arizona.

The fact that we've lost 6 out of the last 7 to these posers is unacceptable, and it needs to stop now.

Arizona should never be anywhere close to decent in football. They're a basketball school, and one that needs to cheat to even be that.

Arizona is a naturally beautiful city, which makes them twice as lame, because, unlike us, they're unable to turn the fact that they are in a naturally beautiful city into being something other than a crap second rate **** school. Also, said natural beauty is only bearable half the year, otherwise you feel like you're walking on the surface of the sun. I believe people get sunstroke walking across the street. Which, if you think about it, could explain how the following decisions were made.

Arizona's mascot is the Wildcat. Wow - super creative, Arizona. Did you figure 'Tigers' wasn't mainstream enough for you? Oh, and Miss Wildcat, Minnie Mouse called and said she wanted the blatant ripoff of "Well, I guess we need something for the girls" back.

I don't know what the deal is with 'Bear Down'. Is it their school motto or something? Is it like that "Tear 'em asunder" thing they do in Fort Collins? Anyway, if they think it is cool, just like their apparent notion that their men's basketball program isn't dirty as ****, they're wrong. As has been pointed out in other threads, the only time you should hear the words "Bear Down" together is when someone is trying to pop a human out of another human. Otherwise, it sounds like you're taking a ****, in which case "Bear Down" is the last thing you should do. That's how Elvis died, you know.

They call themselves "Zona". We call them the Chards. Because Chards is creative. Zona sounds like your alcoholic uncle trying to tell you where he wants to retire.

Arizona doesn't have the reputation of its rival school Arizona State for all of their female students being strippers, so that's good. Or is it? Could it be that the stripper recruiters took the 90 minute trip down from Tempe to Tucson, took a look around, said "Nuh uh", and headed back to Tempe? I mean, what's the more logical scenario? Exactly.

Speaking of retirement, the state of Arizona ranks second only to Florida in terms of places people go to die. Colorado attracts young, dynamic people wanting to live among active, energetic people like themselves (who might be potheads). Arizona attracts irritable old people from the Midwest who only live for golf and I guess pickleball, whatever the **** that is.

Truth be told, Colorado is better than Arizona in every single way. Like literally all of them. So it stands to reason that this losing streak must end. Now.
Click to expand...
FACT: Tucson sucks. My wife is from there and refuses to ever live there again, thankfully.
 
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