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Good times are coming

Yo @Darth Snow - what does this omen portend?
Woman, 72, gored by bison at Yellowstone after getting too close for photos, park says

If that was a ****braska grandma, I see a NC in our future!
based on recos from Park employees, I read the book Deaths in Yellowstone. I expected it to be a morbidly funny collection of anecdotes, but it was really a data dump with poorly written prose. Regardless, a few stories stuck in my mind.
  • woman was suspected of feeding bears. ranger saw her get out of her car with a bag of chocolates, in an area where bears were active at the time. Ranger warned her not to feed them, but as soon as he/she turned away, the woman starts feeding a bear from her bag of chocolate. Woman remarks to others how tame the bears are. She's holding up one piece of chocolate at a time, getting the bear to beg for the next piece like its a domesticated dog. After half the bag is gone, the woman rolls it up, tells the bear "no, you've had enough" and starts back to her car. the bear disagreed that he'd had enough, killed the woman with one swipe of a clawed paw, and ate the rest of the chocolate.
  • man dives into a geyser after his dog. that one really got me. if the dog had dove in after the person, the remarks would be "loyal dog. dumb AF, but loyal". when it happens in the opposite order, I don't know what to say.
  • despite warnings from rangers, woman lets dog run off-leash. dog sees bear, runs after it barking. bear kills dog, woman tries to save her dog from the bear and gets herself killed in the process
most of it was recounting episodes of death by hypothermia, death by falling, deaths by burning (in geothermal features) and deaths by normal medical conditions. I do recall remarking on the completeness of the book, as there was even on chapter titled "Deaths by Indian Attack" and a chapter on deaths by shooting (a few domestic disputes, a few cases of outlaws hiding in the park).
 
based on recos from Park employees, I read the book Deaths in Yellowstone. I expected it to be a morbidly funny collection of anecdotes, but it was really a data dump with poorly written prose. Regardless, a few stories stuck in my mind.
  • woman was suspected of feeding bears. ranger saw her get out of her car with a bag of chocolates, in an area where bears were active at the time. Ranger warned her not to feed them, but as soon as he/she turned away, the woman starts feeding a bear from her bag of chocolate. Woman remarks to others how tame the bears are. She's holding up one piece of chocolate at a time, getting the bear to beg for the next piece like its a domesticated dog. After half the bag is gone, the woman rolls it up, tells the bear "no, you've had enough" and starts back to her car. the bear disagreed that he'd had enough, killed the woman with one swipe of a clawed paw, and ate the rest of the chocolate.
  • man dives into a geyser after his dog. that one really got me. if the dog had dove in after the person, the remarks would be "loyal dog. dumb AF, but loyal". when it happens in the opposite order, I don't know what to say.
  • despite warnings from rangers, woman lets dog run off-leash. dog sees bear, runs after it barking. bear kills dog, woman tries to save her dog from the bear and gets herself killed in the process
most of it was recounting episodes of death by hypothermia, death by falling, deaths by burning (in geothermal features) and deaths by normal medical conditions. I do recall remarking on the completeness of the book, as there was even on chapter titled "Deaths by Indian Attack" and a chapter on deaths by shooting (a few domestic disputes, a few cases of outlaws hiding in the park).
Shocking, we have plenty of idiots in the world.
 
based on recos from Park employees, I read the book Deaths in Yellowstone. I expected it to be a morbidly funny collection of anecdotes, but it was really a data dump with poorly written prose. Regardless, a few stories stuck in my mind.
  • woman was suspected of feeding bears. ranger saw her get out of her car with a bag of chocolates, in an area where bears were active at the time. Ranger warned her not to feed them, but as soon as he/she turned away, the woman starts feeding a bear from her bag of chocolate. Woman remarks to others how tame the bears are. She's holding up one piece of chocolate at a time, getting the bear to beg for the next piece like its a domesticated dog. After half the bag is gone, the woman rolls it up, tells the bear "no, you've had enough" and starts back to her car. the bear disagreed that he'd had enough, killed the woman with one swipe of a clawed paw, and ate the rest of the chocolate.
  • man dives into a geyser after his dog. that one really got me. if the dog had dove in after the person, the remarks would be "loyal dog. dumb AF, but loyal". when it happens in the opposite order, I don't know what to say.
  • despite warnings from rangers, woman lets dog run off-leash. dog sees bear, runs after it barking. bear kills dog, woman tries to save her dog from the bear and gets herself killed in the process
most of it was recounting episodes of death by hypothermia, death by falling, deaths by burning (in geothermal features) and deaths by normal medical conditions. I do recall remarking on the completeness of the book, as there was even on chapter titled "Deaths by Indian Attack" and a chapter on deaths by shooting (a few domestic disputes, a few cases of outlaws hiding in the park).
Once upon a time I thought I was going to be a Park Ranger.

This reminds me of the first day of my "Intro to Park Ranger" class we were instructed that the job of a Park Ranger consists of three things:
  • Protect the people in the park from the park
  • Protect the people in the park from the other people in the park
  • Protect the park from the people in the park
 
Once upon a time I thought I was going to be a Park Ranger.

This reminds me of the first day of my "Intro to Park Ranger" class we were instructed that the job of a Park Ranger consists of three things:
  • Protect the people in the park from the park
  • Protect the people in the park from the other people in the park
  • Protect the park from the people in the park

Why did you write them in reverse order of importance?
 
Saving the best for last???
Not that instructor, their perspective was that Park Rangers were Police Officers who happened to work in Parks; I think she was the kind of Park Ranger that appreciated dirt bike riders at Rampart Range, but didn't understand backpackers who did the CDT. I gathered it was because the existence of one of those groups provides a fair bit more job security to Rangers.
 
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